FAQ

Questions, shortly.

What is Love, Apparently?

A small set of tools for making sense of dating, relationships, situationships, mixed signals and everything in between. You answer questions about how someone actually behaves – or hand over the conversation you keep rereading – and get back something structured enough to think with.

You do not need to be officially anything. Talking stages, situationships, exes, almost-relationships and “it’s complicated” are most of what we do.

It is not advice, and it is not a person. It is the second opinion you would get from a friend who has read the whole thread and is no longer being polite about it.

What is The Situationship Test?

The quick one, for connections where the real question is what exactly is going on here. Fourteen questions, about two minutes.

It measures four things separately: how interested they seem, how much effort actually shows up, how clear any of this has been made, and whether it is moving anywhere. The last two are the point. Someone can be genuinely interested in you and have no intention of building anything, and the distance between those two numbers is usually the whole reason it feels confusing.

What is the Compatibility Check?

The long one – 39 questions, about ten minutes – for when the question is less what is this and more whether the two of you actually work.

It looks at seven dimensions, from how conflict goes to whether you want the same future, and measures chemistry separately from compatibility. Those two come apart more often than people expect, and a test that cannot tell them apart is not much use.

What is the Text Analyzer?

It reads a conversation instead of asking you questions. Paste it, or upload a screenshot, and it looks at the patterns in how the two of you write: who starts things, who carries the thread, what gets answered and what quietly does not, whether the words and the behaviour tell the same story. It takes as long as it takes you to paste the conversation.

English only for now, and it will say so rather than guess. That is not about translation: this tool has checks that stop it responding to conversations it has no business analysing – anything about someone being hurt, or about hurting themselves – and those checks are written in English. They do not work in another language, and analysing something they never looked at would be worse than saying no. The two tests are unaffected, because you pick from written answers.

You bring the screenshots. It brings the second opinion.

Can it tell me what they really mean?

It can tell you what their messaging is doing. It cannot tell you what is going on inside someone's head, and anything that claims otherwise is guessing at you confidently.

So it stays with what is actually in front of it: the pattern, the signals, and the readings those support. That is less satisfying than a verdict on their soul and considerably more useful.

Do I need to know their answers?

No, and we deliberately do not ask you to guess them. Every question is about what you have seen and what you need, because nobody knows for certain how somebody else would answer a question about themselves – and a guess dressed up as data ends up in your result as though it were a fact.

No questionnaire to forward. No casual interrogation over dinner.

Is this just another compatibility quiz?

There are numbers, and the numbers are not the product. A percentage on its own tells you nothing you can act on, which is why every score comes with what it means, the pattern your answers fall into, and something to do about it.

The questions are about behaviour you could point to – how often they follow through, who makes the plans, what happens when you bring up where this is going – not whether you both like staying in on Fridays. They are also ours: we deliberately did not copy from published psychological scales.

That said, this is not a psychological test and we will not pretend otherwise. It is built for entertainment and self-reflection. It isn't therapy, it isn't a diagnosis, and it isn't a substitute for either.

Will you tell me whether to leave?

No. You will get the patterns, the inconsistencies, what is working and what is worth worrying about – and a straight answer about what this looks like. What you do about it stays yours.

The aim is not to make the decision for you. It is to make it clear what you are deciding about.

Who writes my reading?

The Situationship Test, all of it, is written by us in advance. It works out which of seven patterns you are in and gives you the writing for that one – what it is, what to do next, and what to say. The same result gets the same words every time, and that is the point rather than a shortcut: writing produced fresh on every visit hedges, flatters and tells you what you want to hear.

Compatibility Check is half ours. The seven scores and what each one means we wrote ahead of time. The part that reads your particular combination – the pattern, the risk, the conversations worth having, the verdict – is assembled for your answers by a language model, because nobody can write that in advance for 39 questions' worth of possible results.

The Text Analyzer is the one that could not be anything else, because it is reading a conversation nobody has ever seen before.

So: where an answer can be committed to ahead of time, we commit to it. Where it genuinely depends on your combination, we use the thing that is better at that. We would rather tell you which is which than leave you wondering.

What happens to what I give you?

Your answers are stored so your reading can be produced and so you can come back to it later. Taking a test requires no account, no email address and no signup. If you buy a reading, our payment provider collects what it needs to take payment and meet tax rules – we never see your card details. After a purchase you can choose to give us an address so we can email you the link – that is optional, it is stored only so we can send that link again, and it is never used for anything else.

A conversation you paste in gets more care, because it is not only about you. Names, email addresses, phone numbers, links and handles are taken out before it goes anywhere. That happens twice: once in your browser, where you are shown what was found and can edit it, and again on our side, because a browser is a convenience and not a safeguard.

The stripped-down version is what the model reads, and it is stored so your reading can be produced and reopened later. If you use a screenshot instead of pasting, the image is read on your own device and never uploaded at all.

Some conversations should not go into a tool like this one – anything about someone being hurt, or about hurting themselves. Those do not get analysed. You get somewhere useful to go instead, and nothing is sent anywhere.

Will they find out I did this?

No. Nothing is sent to anyone, nothing is posted anywhere, and there is nothing to notify. Whoever you are asking about cannot see your answers, your conversation or your result.

The only person who sees any of it is you, unless you decide otherwise. Your situationship does not need a wider audience.

Why do I pay to unlock the full reading?

The result is free – you see it the moment you finish, with no email and no account. What you pay for is the reading underneath it: every score explained, the pattern you landed in, and one specific thing to do next. You always see the price before you pay, on the page where you pay it, and it is a single payment with nothing recurring.

For The Situationship Test that means all four scores explained, the gap between how much they like you and how much they are building, the pattern keeping you there, one thing to do about it and the words to do it with. Compatibility Check adds where it is most likely to break and the conversations worth having. The Text Analyzer reads your conversation instead, and answers the question everybody actually wants answered, which is what to send back.

How do I get back to my reading afterwards?

Through its link. There is no account here – that is the trade for no signup – so the address of your result page is how you reopen it. Save it as soon as you have it: bookmark it, or send the link to yourself. Paid readings can also be downloaded as a PDF from the report itself.

Once a reading is paid for, the report page also offers to email you the link. That field is optional and it is the only time we ask for an address – never before you buy, and never to see your free result. If you use it, you can have your readings sent again from our lost link page, and we will not send you anything else.

If you never gave us an address and you lose the link, we can still find it: email hello@loveapparently.com with the transaction number from your payment receipt. Lost the receipt too? Write from the address you paid with and we will trace it. Paid readings stay available for at least 12 months from the date of purchase, as our Terms set out.

A free result that has not been paid for cannot be recovered once the link is gone, because we hold nothing that identifies you. That is the honest cost of not asking for your email, and it is why the page tells you to save the link before anything else.

Can I get a refund?

Yes. Email us within 30 days and we'll refund you in full. You don't need to give a reason and you don't need to have contacted us about a problem first.

Can I do this again about someone else?

As many times as you like. New person, new conversation, new plot twist. The tests are free every time; you only pay if you want the full reading for a particular result.

What if my result feels wrong?

It's reading the answers you gave, so start there – people often answer for how it feels on a good week rather than how it's actually gone for months. Take it again and answer for the whole of it.

And if it still feels wrong, that's information too. Disagreeing strongly with a low score usually means something.

I have another question.

Email hello@loveapparently.com and we'll get back to you. A person reads it.