“You weren't asking for too much. You were asking the wrong person for it.”

This one arrived years late and rearranged a great deal. What I had wanted was not extravagant. Being told about plans in advance. Being answered on the same day.

Whether that is too much depends entirely on who you are asking, and I had spent a long time treating one person's capacity as a measurement of my reasonableness. It is a small shift and it changes the question. Not: am I too much. But: is this someone who wants to do this. The second question has an answer you can actually check.